The Fame
When you became the center of attention, you felt so overwhelmed and loved by everyone. you felt empowering. everyone adored you, and everything you did is monitored in the public's eye. they talked about you all the time, complimented you and some even became obsessed. others create unnecessary rumors about you and it hurts. you acted all perfect, so that people would erase the bad thoughts away and focus on your good qualities. you became obsessed on being perfect. flawless. they expected you to make no mistake in life as if you are inhuman. you felt like they have done so much for you, and that you needed to repay them back. because you thought they love you. as time passes, the attention fazes out. they start to focus their attention on someone else, and you feel abandoned. don't they love you anymore? how can they just leave you after all that you have been through together? through dark hedges and light symphony? and you sit at the corner of your room, thinking about your life. despair is all you can feel, and you think about who is really there for you and who have always been and you think of no one. but yourself.
The Fear
The future is a scary prediction. a vision of the unknown. redundant pictures begin to unravel inside your mind, as you think on what is ahead of you. mostly, its a dark path. a blurry road, a journey that you don't want to embark in but at the same time you're curious to see whether that path will end up happily. you think that you're just paranoid and maybe, things are not what it seems. that everything is going to be just fine, you shouldn't just make irrelevant assumptions. positive thinking. you're going to end up moving to the right direction, and even though you will have a bad ending, a lesson will always be learned. Allah is just testing you. everything is fated and planned. you need to keep your heads up, and just go wherever the road takes you. good or bad, it doesn't matter. as long as you pack something that will guide you safely, which is faith.
The Innocence
You are afraid of losing him. at the same time, you act like the love you share with him is just platonic. a chaste of passion. because you never received love in the past, you don't know how to return it. well, maybe you have experienced several relationships in the past, but those were just meaningless flings and raving hormones. puppy love, as they would call it. you appreciated them, but it was nothing special. now all of a sudden, he came in like a dream. you feel insecure and petrified. you want the odd feeling to go, but you want him to stay. so you treat him no different from others. he indicates that you don't really love him, but you do. you just don't know show him that he is special to you. the brightest gem, in a sea of treasure. you don't mind if he is around a swarm of girls, you know that he still loves you the most. you don't mind that he is surrounded by hardships because he would get through them as long ad you're there, by his side. he gets jealous of you at times but you act like you don't care and don't know he feels that way. so, he ask you to let him go. because he couldn't bare the idea of the woman he loves doesn't love him back. and so you let him go. let the man who is nearly perfect for you, away just like that. only because of a misunderstanding. because you don't know how to express your feelings. how much. your passion is. the love is not platonic, its pure. and now, its completely gone.